Hookah? Yes.
So…
For the majority of my day today, I’ve been in good company. Even though I’ve been hanging out with friends all day, I’ve never felt so alone.
All I think about is him. Every thing around me reminds me of him, even the shit people say, I could relate to stuff that reminds me of him. It’s actually really annoying. It’s not that I don’t want him out of my head, it just makes me sad that I can’t be on my own and be happy. It’s not like we broke up, he’s just going away for awhile, at least till he gets boot camp and A-School over with. Even then, he’ll be too busy or I’ll be too busy with school in San Francisco. I feel so lost. It hurts how much I miss him. I’ve never felt like this before and I’m kind of scared. I’m just glad that I have friends that are there to support me being on my own. I’m so thankful for you guys and I’m so happy that I’ve met them. Every thing that I need to focus on needs to be dealt with and soon.
1) Apartment stuff
2) Registration
3) Meet with his parents for traveling arrangements to his graduation and New York!
4) Clean out my room/car
5) Lingerie shoot
6) Shopping for new clothes/make up
7) Start the job
Those are the things I need to focus on right now. As for Darren, he’s not coming back any time soon, so I need to stop putting most of my attention on him because nothing is going to change the day I’m going to see him again. I had to let this out somehow, so there it is.
He swore in today. He left for the airport already. I’ll see you at Great Lakes soon, baby. I miss you.
